Surgery

A couple of years ago, I noticed that something had "popped" up. My brain immediately spins and wonders "do I have cancer?" " am I gonna die?!" It was just a Bartholin cyst. Something a lot of women get over their lifetime. I went to my OB-GYN and had it looked at. She treated it with antibiotics, but the stubborn thing didn't go away. So, I went back and had it drained. Ouch! Again, a few weeks later, the stubborn thing came back! Frustrated, I went back and had it drained again. This time, it went away for about a month and returned again. Now, I realize I'm stubborn....but goodness! This thing was worse than me! (Unimaginable, right?)

So, I tried to forget it was even there. It wasn't hurting me, so I ignored it. Months went by and it actually almost became a normality. It was just there. Hanging' out. I was dealing with my mom's illness and death so I honestly just put it on the backburner for a while. Eventually, things in my life settled down, and the conversations between Matt and I led to when we wanted to start a family together. I knew that I needed to talk with my OB-GYN about the cyst and having it surgically removed so the stubborn thing couldn't come back.

I went in September to discuss it and set up surgery. She informed me I'd be out of work for several days and that I'd be in SEVERE pain. I blew it off and was like, "oh, pain's fine....just get it off me!"

Last night, before my surgery this morning, I was laying in bed letting my mind wander. I had been in a bad mood all afternoon and evening. I couldn't figure out why. Then it hit me. I really needed my mom. I needed to hear her reassure me that I'd do fine and everything was going to be ok. I'd heard this from nearly every friend or family member I'd talked about the surgery with, but it just isn't the same. There are times where only MOM will do. I broke down and was sobbing.....Matt just hugged me. He didn't speak or ask what was wrong. He didn't have to because he knew. That's where I feel I'm the luckiest girl in the world. God took my mother from me, but in return he gave me the best thing that has ever happened to me. I count my blessings every day.

This morning, as we got up at 4:30, I was nervous. I didn't know how I'd react to the anesthesia or how much pain I'd be in. I was scared. I closed my eyes and thought about what my mom would say, because she would've made me call her on the way to the hospital....no doubt. As we drove up, most of my fears were gone. I just wanted to get it over with.

Several hours later, I was in recovery all hocked up on anesthesia and morphine with Matt by my side. The doctor said I did well, and that I'll need to take it easy for several days.

I am so fortunate to have such caring friends and family. I also am extremely fortunate to have Matt as my husband. He's the best nurse ever!